Surprise: You're pregnant!
To say that the pregnancy of our second child came as a surprise would be an understatement. To give a little background on the few months before I was pregnant, the springtime I had been experiencing some health problems that gradually became worse. By June 2011, I had woken up one morning and had no feeling from my stomach down. I spent the remainder of summer in the hospital and doing rehab to relearn how to use my legs again. (There was no definite diagnosis until recently where it was decided that I likely have a condition called CIDP, Chronic Inflammatory Demyelinating Polyneuropathy- the chronic counterpart of Guillian Barre Syndrome, similar symptoms to MS.) Upon finding out I was pregnant, my OB recommended I terminate my pregnancy. She convinced me that I wasn't healthy, my pregnancy would be high risk and she also lectured me with "If I were in your shoes...." I knew that ending my pregnancy would not be an option. We *DID* want more children after all. And even though it wasn't our timing, there had to be a purpose for the timing of this baby.
When I gave birth to Michaela, I was somewhat bullied into a c-section. I was given reasons why I should schedule a section, lots of negatives. And we conceded. I missed the opportunity to hold my baby until hours after her birth. We did not enjoy skin-to-skin bonding. She had difficulty nursing. Because I developed a fever, she was placed in the ICU as a precaution. I was so groggy from the narcotics post-surgery that I don't remember much the first few days except the pain. I felt robbed of the joy a new mother should have after birthing a baby. I KNEW with my second baby that I was entitled to that joy. I knew my body was capable of more than what my original OB believed. So I left the recommendation from my OB and sought out a supportive midwife, despite my neurological issues.
Midwives, Bradley, and more
My best friend in Boston had taken a Bradley birth class the year before and highly recommended it. It's a whole natural childbirth movement that focuses on husband-coached childbirth, prenatal nutrition, relaxation and education. So we decided this would be a good course for us to do, plus it gave us a great date night every week. Our Bradley instructor recommended Avalon Midwives out of Morristown Memorial Hospital. They decided that I would eligible to attempt a VBAC (despite me only have a one layer closure from my previous c-section.) I remember their nurse practitioner (who I loved) bluntly said to me, there's a 50/50 chance I will get my natural vaginal delivery. So this made my husband and I even more zealous about educating ourselves and being as healthy as possible to have this natural delivery. Because of all my health issues, I was having monthly ultrasounds at a maternal fetal medicine group, all of which came back normal. But as much as I was doing home exercises, eating well, and focusing/praying on positive outcome, each ultrasound kept showing a breech baby. It wasn't till about 32 weeks that the U/S tech said that it's unlikely the baby would turn much more. (Also around this time, due to my neuropathy, I took a nasty fall and broke my foot. Boo!)
Turn that baby!
So in NJ, breech positioned baby=scheduled c-section. I sought out the care of a Webster Certified Chiropractor (Dr. Shelley Sousa, Flourising Family Chiropractic, in Cranford, NJ) She was quick to get me in to start adjustments. Webster technique generally has an 70-80% success rate in turning breech positioned babies. The specific adjustments help to open up the pelvis and lower back, to give optimal room for baby to get into the best position. However by 36 weeks, the baby still had not turned and I was getting desperate. I even began spending time standing on my head, hoping the baby would tilt back and then slide into place. By recommendation of my Bradley teacher and friend, Melissa, I sought out a group called "Spinning Babies." It's a website/movement run by a lovely midwife, Gail, who educates pregnant mothers and providers on optimal fetal positioning. There was a Spinning Babies conference for providers when I was about 37w, and I contacted them asking to be considered as a guinea pig: they accepted. What an amazing group of women! My belly was rubbed and manipulated by doulas, massage therapists, midwives, etc. I was the model for different methods such as rebozo sifting, abdominal lifting, side lying releases, and even some work on the birth ball. When my portion of the hands on part was over, I spent some time talking to the ladies and Gail. I cried at my desire to birth my baby naturally. Then, a lovely massage therapist, asked if she could do a myofascial massage on my belly bump. It was heavenly. And I left encouraged to keep up with the exercises, chiropractic care, prayer and visualization of how I wanted my birth to go. My midwives suggested I schedule a hospital ECV, external cephalic version, a procedure where the baby is manually manipulated into better positioning. I'd been told it can be painful, can onset labor and also may not work. So at 38w5d, I went into MMH to face the procedure. Hoping and praying for my baby to flip, I arrived at the hospital and to my surprise, that precious baby girl had flipped on her own. (By this time, I was seeing my chiropractor 4-5 days a week.) She was incredible. Her and the Spinning Babies ladies. I can't believe this breech baby flipped...at almost 39 weeks. What a blessing!
Labor is hard work
I had never experienced labor before and have to say: there's no way to really get someone to understand how intense it is. I was a few days past due, slightly dilated as per my 40w1d appointment, and ready for this little turkey to come. I had a chiropractic adjustment on Saturday around 11:30am and in the middle started feeling some cramping. It was coming in waves. Interesting. Not too painful. Manageable. So Tre, Michaela and myself went to get something to eat. 15 minutes apart at 30seconds each. Pretty good. This could be the day (Hooray! I get my Cinco baby!) BY 5:30pm we called my parents. This is it! We arrived at the hospital with our wonderful doula, Melissa, by 10pm (after stopping at Friendly's for a quick pick-me-up.) I was humming through contractions. I thought "I can do this. Easy as pie" But the midwife examined me and said that I just wasn't dilated much. No more than my visit two days before. Boo....We all went home hoping the contractions would cease and give me some rest overnight. (HA! Was I majorly mistaken) My parents were wonderful and still stayed overnight to watch Michaela. I was, in fact, still in labor and overnight things had picked up. My husband was working his first big event for his new job (which only started a week before) and by noon, 24 hours into labor, I was in tears. Painful. Difficult. Shower didn’t help much. My mom did her best to coach me through the waves, but I knew I needed to be at the hospital. I remember my darling 2 year old Michaela embraced my leg, and a contraction came on. First thing out of my mouth was "Don't touch me!" (Poor thing had no idea.) Tre came home and for a moment in the car on the way there, I almost lost it with him, yelling "DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THIS HURTS" (Haha!) The hospital confirmed I was dilated and was having a baby that day. :) Even though I was at the hospital, I felt the pain was more manageable there. I had my doula and friend, my husband, fewer distractions than home and I was ready. I thought I was in pain. Labor progressed throughout the day but sort of stalled out by 6cm. My midwife, Joanne C, broke my water. Sadly it had meconium in it, so I could not deliver inside the bathtub. But the shower was perfectly fine with me. My wonderful birth photographer Alice was called and arrived shortly after. Well, after my water was broken, I learned a new level of maddening pain. What did I get myself into? Is this really worth it? Am I sure a c-section wouldn't have been a better option? We later found out that the baby was in a posterior position, which means she was facing my back, hence no relief in between contractions. Baby girls heart rate stayed so strong through the whole labor and at 9:10pm it was time to push. In 15minutes, I felt her head and with one last push, she was on my chest.
Never knew a love like this before
A little peanut. (My first words to her was "Oh look how tiny you are") My Abigail Joy. My miracle baby. I like to say she was and is the next chapter of the Galman love story. I never felt so awake and alive. With one sip of orange juice, I had the energy of a marathon runner (before running the marathon.) I called my mom and best friends and cried. She was here. The highly anticipated AJ. And she entered the world without pitocin, without an epidural, touching mommy as she came out, covered in love. Within minutes, she was nursing (and still is, one year later, despite the prognosis of insufficient gland development) I was a mom, again. The love filled my heart and overflowed. I sure defied some odds, pushing a baby out with neuropathy. Not even sure there are anymore words for the incredible experience I had birthing my 2nd child. Or even much more to type (sorry, I know I'm long-winded) But big thank you to: Avalon midwives, especially Joanne Cunha; Alice Tracy, incredible birth photographer who caught the most incredible moments for us while being discreet and respectful; Dr. Shelly, my amazing Chiropractor; Gail and the Spinning Babies team; Melissa, my doula, Bradley instructor, and dear friend; my wonderful parents who helped in early labor and took care of Michaela for several days; for Tre- my incredible husband; for my Heavenly Father with whom all things are possible.
I love my children equally. But my experience with Abby was far superior to the first.
Abigail means: 'Father in rejoicing' or 'gives joy'. Her middle name is Joy. So this baby is truly a double portion of joy.
Happy 1st Birthday, my darling Abby!
"The Lord your God is in your midst. The Mighty One will save you; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing and JOY." Zephaniah 3:17
*As a side note: I want to say that I truly believe C-sections can be wonderful and have the ability to save the lives of the mother and baby. In my particular situation, I do not believe mine was necessary.
**When I was facing my neurological attack before pregnancy, I had a lumbar puncture (aka spinal tap) Immediately after that procedure I had a seizure which placed me in the ICU. A prospective epidural or spinal block for my 2nd birth was not an option. If I had a c-section, I would've been under general anesthesia.
